We live in cis- heteronormative society and we need to change that, but before that, we need to understand these two terms. Cisgender is when one’s gender identity matches the gender they were assigned at birth. Trans, non-binary, gender fluid and others are not considered cisgender. Heterosexual is when an individual is attracted to the opposite gender only.
Transgender individuals can also be straight. In our society, it’s the idea that binary gender identity and heterosexual orientation are the norms. If you’re not heteronormative you’re forced to explain yourself, while cisgender and heterosexual people don’t have to. You don’t owe an explanation to anyone! It’s no one’s business but your own who you are attracted to, how you identify, and how you express your gender or non-conforming gender identity.
Assuming that people only identify as either men or women is incorrect. We commonly think of gender as just man and woman, especially when we’re categorized by things like color and clothing. This is heteronormativity. But the thing is, not everyone identifies one or the other, or expresses themselves that way. Even if someone “looks” like a guy they may prefer to use the pronouns “she/her”. Some people identify as gender fluid, which means that their identity, can move from one side of the spectrum to the other, and some people are genderless or identify with neither of the genders that are imposed on people.
Assuming all people are straight is incorrect. Plain and simple, not everyone is straight. And not everyone is gay. Less than 50% of the teen population currently identifies as straight, but even if the majority of people identified as straight, it’s wrong to assume someone falls into the majority. This is the erasure of all other identities that do not fall under heteronormativity. To make sure everyone feels respected, never assume anything about someone’s identity unless they tell you themselves. Some people prefer having no label at all, and that’s ok and completely fine.
Now ponder on yourself why is it socially acceptable to assume that your child is heterosexual and cisgender but inappropriate and unacceptable to assume that they aren’t.